Monday, August 22, 2011

Again. I did it again.

I had all these great "thoughts" last night. Things worth writing down! And I didn't. Good grief, I'm pathetic. I did finish reading "The Help" though, so there's that. Good book and I'm looking forward to seeing how it translates into film.

What I need is a journal type notebook and a book light that isn't glaring or obvious or 'holy crap what is that' wake up the husband type light.  Oh and a real nightstand to put such things on.


Saturday, August 20, 2011

Not a wordsmith

I am not a wordsmith. I am the opposite of a wordsmith, whatever that is. I am terrible with words. Written, Spoken, Implied. I tell ridiculous stories that make no sense. I say what I believe people or animals/pets are thinking without being clear that's what I'm doing, thoroughly confusing everyone around me. Working at home, I tend to ramble when I get face time with other adults, as though it's my last hope of having a real conversation.  And yet, I still want to write something. Something interesting that other people might read. A story, a true story, or a mixed true/embellished story. Something based on things I know about (kids? web design? crazy parents and siblings? insane drivers?)...or maybe something completely made up.  I dunno. I think I need to start bringing paper to bed with me, because when I turn off the TV my mind doesn't stop. It keeps going for quite a long time. So..I'm going to just list some things I think about..before I sleep. When I wish I would get up and write them down, but I'm too lazy and afraid of failure to do it.

- I should write a book titled "Why Children Lick the Cart. A guide for parents when kids make them say wha???"  And explain, in my completely unprofessional, totally uneducated opinion why kids do some of the things they do, how to deal with it and mostly just get all the crazy shit they do out on paper. Its mind blowing to me that I may have done some of these same idiotic things as a child as well. How can that be?

- I should start a life coaching company. There are a lot of morons that could benefit from my no nonsense, Dr. Phil without the psychology degree common sense advice. For a small fee, I could tell you NOT to buy a car with a credit card. Also, sign up for a 401k ASAP if you can. SAVE NOW. Things like that. Things that don't occur to the common sensically challenged. The biggest problem with this idea is that I'd be inclined to tell people they ARE IDIOTS and WTF why aren't you listening to me, OMG. And then, I'm probably out of business. I have no patience for idiots. Or maybe I just write a book 'I am your Life Coach and you WILL listen to me' instead, so people can buy it and just put it down if I piss them off.

-Now I'm angry with myself for not getting up last night and writing more of this down, because I've forgotten some of it and now i'll have to wait to document more of it.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Jedi Mind School

So we're addicted to Big Brother. Yes, we're aware that it's a horrible show. We're addicted, it is what it is. So each year, we order Showtime so we can watch Big Brother After Dark (BBAD) and see what's going on in the house after hours. Usually, its nothing. Less than nothing. Last night there was still nothing going on, but Rachel and Jeff and Jordan were outside, just talking on the couches. And Jeff was recounting how he talked to Kalia (current HoH) about nominations. He told her, if she puts him up, she becomes his #1 target. The next moment she says, hey, I just want us to be on the same page here. He cannot believe her...I JUST SAID YOU ARE MY #1 TARGET if you put me up..how can she now want to be on the same page. WTF. He says... "She needs to go back to Jedi Mind School. Because her shit ain't working" OMG. We laughed soooo hard. It was perfect, it's how all the houseguests act, like they have jedi mind tricks and they try to work them on everyone at the same time and none of it works.

The husband says he's going to start using that line.

You need to go back to jedi mind school. Cuz your shit ain't workin. 

Awesome

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Stuff

Wow I suck at blogging. Anyway..almost on vacation, almost time for school to start again. I registered for another 5k in September even though I feel like a slacker when I run now. Maybe I'll get a chance to run outside this weekend again. The puppies also got their first haircuts. They're exhausted now.